Episode 21: Proactive Aging

I'm 49. How about you?

Transcript

Our American society has recently made the shift from the notion of ‘anti-aging’ to ‘pro-aging’ or ‘healthy aging’… and most recently to… PROACTIVE AGING. 

What does this mean?

In the most general sense, it means that we understand that aging is part of living, and that it’s counter-intuitive… not to mention potentially psychologically damaging… to view this very natural process as something that we should fear and actively fight against. The cultural obsession with youth has led many a human down a detrimental path. And instead of working with the natural aging process to become the best human they can be, many people fight so hard against it that they end up damaging themselves both physically and emotionally over the long term. And we’re not just talking about the obvious examples like body and sometimes life-altering surgery. Even misunderstanding what happens to the body over time in terms of nutrition, movement and self care… can lead to long term injury and discomfort as we live out our final years. 

If we think of this internal and societal panic over aging in logical terms, it’s laughable almost embarrassing to comprehend. The idea that we would take such strides to fight against a natural process that happens to every living thing on this earth defies even the most elastic of ideas. But here we are, in 2023, still lying about our age and trying to fool all of those who see us that we are somehow younger… and by societal standards more valuable… in the grand scheme of things. 

If we are ever going to shift this narrative in a healthier direction, then we have to start with ourselves. What is it about you that prevents you from enjoying the age in which you find yourself? If we remove the assumption that aging means loose skin, cognitive dysfunction, unwanted weight gain, achy joints and debilitating diseases… what are we left with? We are left with a body that does indeed change as it ages. But we are not left a body that is destined to fall apart as soon as it reaches the halfway point in any given life span.

Can aging skin sag? Yes. So can young skin, depending on how it’s treated. Skin does change with age. All that means is … as it changes, so does the way you treat it. Can cognitive function decline as we age? Yes it can. But it can also be maintained well into our 90’s (this is proven) if we take the steps to keep our minds sharp. The same is true for unexpected and unwanted weight gain, achy joints, and the risk of age-related diseases. All of these things can be addressed and even prevented if you educate yourself and take the necessary steps to get there. But first, you have to be honest.

WHY ARE YOU AFRAID OF AGING?

This is a question that I’d love to present to some of my closest counterparts. As I age, I come in contact with an increasing number of humans who are disinterested in discussing this time of our lives with any real measure of honesty. This is especially true if they are still holding onto the assumptions and habits of their youth. In their defense, it’s not entirely their fault. We live in a society that elevates youth, and associates aging with a measureable loss in value. As women, once we have surpassed our childbearing years, there is an assumption that we are no longer of use. This abusive line of thinking has convinced more than a few humans that aging is akin to losing one’s place of consideration in society… when the reality is that nothing could be further from the truth. With aging comes experience, wisdom, and the delicious ability to no longer give a fuck. Yep. I said what I said. Aging allows us to slough off the anxiety of expectation associated with youth… that we appear a certain way so that we will be liked. Once you’ve surpassed a certain age – for me it was 45 – you legitimately stop caring what others think of you. Either they like you or they don’t. And in the grand scheme of things… it doesn’t really matter.

Of course this does not pertain to the perpetual people pleaser or any other such iteration that prevents that priceless fuck-deficient gene from kicking in. Unfortunately, that’s another subject for another podcast. For the purposes of this podcast, let’s assume that all things are equal.

So, if we can honestly answer the question of why we are afraid of aging, we might be inspired to actually become proactive about the process. And this doesn’t mean that we have to upend our entire way of life in the pursuit of proactive aging. It just means that we have to start in our skin, in this moment, and use that information to decide how to proceed in a proactive way.

Let’s start with the basics. 

The easiest way to assess age and its effects on the body is to look at the physical body… specifically the skin. There comes a point in our lives when gravity takes notice, and actively starts pulling everything toward the ground. Our skin loses elasticity, and has a tougher time recovering from even the smallest disrespect, like a blemish or a spot of hyperpigmentation. Now, before you run out and spend thousands on some anti-aging cream that promises miracles, or start pumping your face and body full of substances to lift and plump it, take stock of where you are in terms of your lifestyle right now, and consider whether there are steps you can take within said lifestyle to give your skin a better quality of life. 

We know that certain foods can end up doing our skin more harm than good. From dairy to refined sugar, the list of things that can lead to less than optimal skin is pretty widely known. Processed carbohydrates in particular can damage the collagen in your skin… the very thing that helps keep it firm, supple and resistant to wrinkles. Social (and sometimes not so social) habits like smoking and drinking can also have a detrimental effect on the quality and the clarity of your skin. When we’re young, these habits may not register in our skin or any other part of our body. But as we age, the consequences of our choices become increasingly apparent… and at a much faster rate than our younger counterparts.

We also know that prolonged unprotected exposure to the sun … or any of nature’s elements can show up in an undesirable way on our skin. Without protection or adequate moisture, our skin can end up dry, textured, and seemingly unresponsive to any topical treatment. 

So if we have this information about the best ways to avoid unnecessary damage to our skin, the most conscientious thing would be to take actions to make these changes part of our daily routines. But we all know this is easier said than done. Food addiction (especially of the processed variety) is as real as sun addiction. That means the process of separating ourselves from these habits may take a little more than just a passing effort. If we understand the magnitude of this task, then it’s best to break it down into smaller, more attainable milestones in order to reach the ultimate goal.

Now, if you’re not sure how to do that, go back and listen to previous episodes on setting goals, starting small, and making the most of every moment in order to reach your highest and your healthiest potential. We covered all the bases for you. Don’t worry… you can do it. 

We know that aging skin tends to lose moisture, so use products or ingredients that replenish that moisture. We know that aging skin tends to lose elasticity. So use products or ingredients that help encourage and maintain that elasticity. Nothing that you use on your skin has to be fancy or expensive. It just has to work for you. Oh… and put on some sunscreen. Just do it. That’s not really up for debate.

Moving onto another sure sign of aging… the way that we feel on the inside. Maybe we don’t have as much energy as we used to. Or do we? I’ve heard people brag about how they used to party all night, get a few hours of sleep, and still perform just fine the next day. These days, they complain that they can barely move their bodies after a relatively boring night and an adequate amount of sleep. 

Here’s the thing: that has nothing to do with the amount of actual energy they have… or have the potential to gain. Forcing your body to perform at optimal levels a day after detrimental behavior is hard on the body at ANY age. When we’re young, our bodies are in a regenerative phase, so it’s easier to recover from such abuse. But that doesn’t negate the nature of the abuse. As we get older, our bodies are less tolerant of it. And if you’re dealing with aches and pains after a quiet night and a good night’s sleep, there’s something else going on. Think back on the things you ate or drank the day or night before. Consider how often you moved your body before bed… or if you moved it at all. Because if you spent the previous day sitting, that also has an effect on how your body behaves as the hours pass into the next day.

Which brings us to the next thing that we’ve come to understand about aging: movement is medicine. There comes a point when our bodies inform us to either move it or lose it. Lack of mobility, particularly in older bodies, has been associated with chronic pain, heart disease, diabetes, loss of bone density, strength and a high risk of injury.

Getting up and moving on a daily basis can go a long way to helping you age in a proactive way. Moving your body is not only good for your physical health, it’s also beneficial for your mental health. Exercise can help improve cognitive function. And when your mind is sharp and your body is strong, you are more likely to move in the direction of things that continue to evolve your overall health and wellbeing. Movement can do more than just keep you sharp. It can be the catalyst to propel you into the next phase of your life.

Your choice of movement doesn’t have to defy the laws of gravity. Avoid social media performers in the gym or any other fitness space, and simply move your body in a way that feels good to you. Because the key is that you move. It’s okay… in fact it’s advisable… to start at the skill level in which you currently find yourself. That doesn’t mean you’re complacent. It just means that you’re in a position to take one consistent step after another as you progress along your physical fitness journey. No one is saying that you have to train to be an Olympic athlete. But you may find, that as you progress and get better at moving your body, your expectations may expand beyond what you originally thought was possible. 

So get up and get moving, and see where the journey takes you. 

And as much as you move, make sure you are balancing that out with adequate rest. The amount of rest you need as you age is likely to change, and it’s a good idea to keep track of exactly how much rest you need to look and feel your best. It’s also a good idea to be selfish about that rest. I know… that doesn’t sound like the best character trait to embody. But it is. If you are not rested… then you are less likely to give your best in whatever way that needs to happen on a regular basis. How can you show up for others, if you can’t even show up for yourself and honor your rest requirements?

Understand that when we’re talking about rest, it doesn’t necessarily means sleep. It’s also important to take rest in the ways that matter most in our lives: from social to sensory… and even creative rest. Do what you need to do – to recharge your proverbial battery rejuvenate your mind and body.

And if you’d like more information on the seven forms of rest… well, we did a podcast on that too. Check out Episode 3.

Now, even with all of these things in alignment, no one can guarantee that the aging process will be seamless. In fact, it’s likely quite the contrary. I’ve personally found that there’s an age related surprise around every corner. There are days when I wake up and everything inside and outside of my body looks and feels completely different than it did the day before. But that doesn’t mean that we don’t try. Even to the point of having daily conversations with your body about what it needs to perform in the best way possible, you can navigate the aging process with grace and do what it takes to help you live a long and balanced existence. 

I personally prefer to treat the changes that come with aging as an opportunity for discovery. I’ve come to enjoy the exploration process as my body changes and advances in new and exciting ways. And during that process, I assess where I am, and what I can do to keep moving myself in the direction that I want to be. The journey is such a valuable part of the process, and… at least in my opinion… it should not be taken for granted.

Now, depending on your environment, you may be surrounded with certain assumptions about aging. From “life is over after 40”… “to life BEGINS at 50”… there is no shortage of sayings to describe the aging process. And those saying may impact what you think is possible during the aging process, and how your personal capabilities factor into that possibility. We can be our own worst enemy when it comes to the natural changes that occur within us and around us. It is up to us to empower ourselves with the knowledge to move forward… at any age.

Because that’s the thing: life doesn’t stop because we age. It just progresses in a different way. If we are proactive about that progression, we can have a real say in the direction that our lives take from day to day… and year to year. If we step away from the notion that our lives are over at a certain age, then we are less likely to give up on ourselves. 

We hope you found this information helpful. If you’d like to learn more, please download the latest issue of HABIBI LIFE Magazine. You can find it on habibibody.com, habibibodysport.com, and shahadakarim.com…