Episode 19: De-Clutter your Life

Get ready for some pre-Spring cleaning! Join us as we work though the best ways to get rid of the things that impede your progress and hold you down. Here's to calm and clarity in our physical, mental and emotional spaces.

Transcript

Whether we know it or not, we’re all participating in some way in the winter thaw. The season is trying it’s best to change by allowing the sun to shine more often than not, and things that come out to play in the warmer seasons… from plants to critters of all sizes and shapes… are emerging to take their places in our environment. The earth is making space for new opportunities to grow, and it’s our chance to follow suit buy making a little space in our own lives.

Many of us tend to ‘collect’ things. From habits to people, many of us have things that occupy our day-to-day lives in ways that are unnecessary and sometimes even detrimental. Some of us are so immersed in catering to this - ‘collection’ - that we can often lose sight of our own wants and needs, and feel unable to advocate for our own space and peace of mind. 

If this is you, don’t worry. There are practical ways to extricate yourself from the current clutter that makes up your existence. You can make the space to sort through what is helpful and what is harmful, and take real steps toward making the space for you to grow in whatever way you need.

There are four main categories that make up the most typically cluttered areas of our lives. They are:

·      PEOPLE

·      PLACES

·      SPACES

·      and SELF

If we distinguish between these categories and examine them individually, it can help us create a clearer picture of exactly what needs to be done to find calm and clarity in all aspects of our lives.

So let’s begin with step one…

CLEAR YOUR PEOPLE

This step involves not only stepping away from, or setting clear boundaries with the humans in your life, but also ‘clearing’ them for access to your physical, mental and emotional self. That is, it might become necessary to categorize the humans in your life based on the healthy interaction or detriment that they bring.

Think of it as a security check: the healthier the interaction with certain humans in your life, the more access they can have to you. The more detrimental the interaction, the less access they can have to you. Because it might be impractical or impossible to cut out all potentially detrimental humans (let’s face is, we either work with or work for or are related to some of those humans), it’s more realistic to simply categorize them in relation to how well they meet your personal health and wellness criteria.

This step is only reserved for those with whom interaction is necessary. For everyone else, your criteria should be a lot stricter. Friends, acquaintances and casual encounters should be held to a much higher standard. That means they can be cut loose if they continue to bring discomfort and drama into your life. Have the courage to take this step, no matter how long you’ve known a person. The length of time a person is in your life is not a measure of the quality they bring to it. If you’ve known a problematic human for a long time, all it means is that you’ve been participating in detrimental interactions for that length of time.

STEP 2: CLEAR YOUR PLACES

Many of us frequent a set number of places in our day to day lives. It might look like going into a physical workplace, going to the gym and going to the grocery store. Most of us see these places as necessary in our daily routines. 

But there are other places in our lives that may not be as necessary. While some of them might be beneficial and under the banner of self care, like going to a spa or making scheduled doctors visits, others might be detrimental. 

Consider the local restaurant that you visit out of habit, but that always makes you feel sick afterwards. Why do you continue to keep it in your list of places to frequent? Maybe there’s more to it than you simply going and eating the food. Maybe it’s a social habit that you’ve developed with a group of friends who tend to always meet at that place. Instead of rolling your eyes internally and going with the flow, consider suggesting a different place that’s more agreeable with your gut health, or scrap the entire idea in lieu of something that’s better for your physical and your mental wellbeing.

STEP 3: CLEAR YOUR SPACES 

This step is two fold, because we occupy more than just our physical spaces. We also occupy a portion of the digital space. From apps to social platforms and just the sheer amount of data we store in the form of photos and videos… it can get pretty crowded in our digital space, and it may become a challenge to navigate it all.

To de-clutter your digital space, start with your electronic devices. What applications or programs are you no longer using? If you’re opening them up less than once a week, there’s a chance that you don’t need them at all. Often, companies will encourage you to download their apps as part of a promotion. But after that initial use, they just take up space on our screens and in our digital memory and end up becoming more of a nuisance than an actual tool. So take a little time and clear out any applications that you don’t actually use. 

Next, turn to your social platforms. No matter how many platforms exist, many of us only prefer one or two on a regular basis. This is usually evidenced by the fact that we visit them several times a week, or even several times a day. If this is true for you, then those are the platforms you keep. Go ahead and get rid of the rest. 

Now because of the nature of social platforms, this might feel easier said than done. Social media is designed to keep us coming back, and we may feel like we’re missing out on something if we don’t at least keep our options open. But the reality is, most social news crosses multiple platforms. It’s extremely rare that some item is exclusive to one platform. So trust you won’t be out of the loop if you step back from certain platforms, and hit that delete button. 

Finally, sort through your communication applications. Most of us communicate through two major apps: email and text. Beyond that, there’s no real need for the other applications. You can establish specialty and group communications, both on and off camera, without the need to collect more applications on your electronic devices. Once you realize that those additional apps are more novel than necessary, it can be easy to delete them and clear up some space on your devices and in your life.

Organize and back up whatever is left, to make navigating your necessary apps and platforms easy. This will help you better navigate your digital space, provide further clarity on what is necessary in your digital world, and help with your overall mental health and well-being.

Now let’s turn to your physical space.

De-cluttering your physical space is obviously more involved, and may take more thought and preparation. But it can be done. Instead of trying to tackle everything at once, start small and make your way onto bigger and more challenging things. It may even be too much to take this task room by room; you might actually need to tackle it one square foot at a time.

Start with your corners. Pick a room, and then pick a corner. Assess what is necessary in that corner alone, and what is not. Set aside the things that are necessary, and make a plan for the things that are not. Perhaps you gift them to someone in your life who might have use for your items, or perhaps you donate them to a program or shelter for someone in greater need. And if neither action makes much sense, perhaps you consider selling the items, or throwing them away. There is no wrong action. The goal is to separate yourself from unnecessary items, so however you need to do that is fine.

Commit to the idea that clearing your physical space will no be a linear or particularly expedient practice. In order to stay consistent, set aside a few hours at specific times each week, and dedicate that time to clearing as much of your physical space as possible. 

STEP FOUR: CLEAR YOURSELF

The final step toward de-cluttering your life concerns the most important person in it: you. Clearing space in your physical and mental body can be the most effective and the most sustainable once you’ve addressed clearing people, places and spaces in your life. But, if life doesn’t work out that way (and let’s be honest, it rarely does), you can still go about the business of de-cluttering your mind and your body for the sake of your overall well-being.

First, let’s de-clutter your body. In order to do this, you have to broach a subject that can be very uncomfortable for many of us. It involves what you eat or drink. If you have a particularly tough time with this subject, might I suggest you listen to Episode 5: Intuitive Practices for the Emotional Eater. It might help you navigate what you eat… and more importantly ‘why’ you eat.

If you set aside the disconnect between emotional and beneficial consumption, and look at the cause and effect of what you eat and how you feel physically, you can practically tackle the idea of de-cluttering you body. Many of us have a general idea about what we eat and how it reacts in our bodies. We can separate foods into distinct categories: from those that give us energy and help us thrive, to those that make us feel lethargic and bloated … and even cause us pain. If you use those categories to identify what we consume on a regular basis, you can sort through what works and what doesn’t and ‘literally’ de-clutter your physical body.

It’s not even necessary to keep a food diary (unless of course that’s what helps your process). You can make the distinction from choice to choice as you consume food throughout the day. If you discover that you consume more foods that are detrimental versus those that are beneficial, you may want to take note and pivot. If the opposite is true, then consider yourself well on your way to de-cluttering your physical self.

There is, of course, a universal hack to de-cluttering your body. 

Water. 

It’s basic and sometimes boring… but it bears repeating. Consuming water has more than a few benefits for your body… including boosting organ function and clearing out excess waste. So if you’re at a loss about where you to start in the de-cluttering process… pick up a glass of water and drink up. 

De-cluttering your physical body can be a challenge, but it’s possible. Like most things in life, the process is not linear and it’s not always easy. But the results can mean a clearer mind, balanced emotions and better sleep. And those things alone are worth the effort.

De-cluttering your mind is a completely different challenge. While we can put our hands on the things that help us clear out the body, it can be a bit more difficult to identify the practices that will help clear out the mind. If you’ve ever been frustrated by the very ‘mention’ of clearing your mind, you’re not alone. The process is not as effortless as some would have you believe, and it’s easy to become discouraged and want to throw the whole practice away.

Instead, take a deep breath and consider some practical habits that might help clear your mind. You can start with the two main events in your daily life: when you wake up and when you go to sleep.

When you wake up, avoid immediately cluttering your mind and psyche with outside noise… especially noise of the digital variety. Instead of turning on your phone or the radio or the television, consider moving through the first few minutes, or even the first hour of your day in silence. Allow your mind and your body to fully come to awareness with just the power of your breath, and gentle movements as you get ready for your day. Whether that’s making and eating breakfast, or showering and dressing, allow the literal actions of your body to occupy your consciousness and nothing more.

Apply those same ideas as you get ready for bed. Set a time to step away from all forms of external stimulus. Turn off your phone, and consider putting on ‘do not disturb’ so that you’re not tempted by phone calls or social media updates. Turn off your television, and turn off most of the lights in your environment. Use only the light you need as you prepare to go to sleep.

You can create a bedtime ritual of clearing your physical sleeping space and preparing your body for rest. Let those actions be the things that you are thinking about as you prepare, and each time you complete a task, let the thought of it fade away as well. The goal is to empty your mind as much as possible, so by the time your head hits the pillow, you are more easily able to slide into a deep sleep.

If you begin and end your day with clarity, you are more likely to approach the hours between with balance and measure. You can better see an event as it is, without artificially magnifying it or allowing it to affect you more than is practical. The more we practice reflection – not just in the beginning and end of our days – but in every hour between, the more we can de-clutter our minds and make space for use to simply exist in harmony with our environment.

Like clearing your physical body, this practice takes time and diligence. You’re not always going to get it right, and you may go long stretches trying to find your way back to your initial intentions. Whatever happens, forgive yourself and show yourself some grace. Remember that you are doing the best you can with the information and the tools that you have. There is always room to evolve, but there is nothing wrong with the space you currently occupy. Remember: you are where you are, because that’s where you are. Keeping this in mind can help you make clear decisions on whether you want to stay in that place, or take real steps to move from it. 

Take it all one breath, one choice, and one step at a time.